A lot of what humans do on a daily basis is just out of habit.
You wake up and have a coffee every morning.
You know you don’t even like to talk to anyone unless you have that coffee.
What time do you leave for work?
Of course, you make time for traffic, you don’t want to be late.
Rough day at work, better have a drink when you get home to relax.
That’s a habit many people have as well.
It’s not just things we do that are habits.
Things like emotions and thoughts can be habit forming as well.
Even people can be habits too.
Many of the things we do, the people we see, the places we frequent are all habits.
They can be good habits, like getting to work on time, or bad habits like smoking a cigarette when you get up in the morning.
However, not all habits are of equal value.
Good habits may not always be beneficial to you in the long run.
Some bad habits may bring you more personal value than giving them up.
Obviously, choices need to be made.
They always need to be made.
What do you use, other than your mind, to make those choices?
You use a mixture of your knowledge, history and experiences.
These decisions that need to be made can be easy or difficult.
But how we can make them a little easier?
In order to make better decisions, we need to change the underlying mindset that leads us to our choices.
That mindset is most often tainted by our habits.
Not just for a particular decision you are making, but in general.
Let’s call it an overarching theme.
How do we change the theme?
When we start to change those little habits that we don’t normally pay attention to, it starts to have a cascading effect in our minds.
Try to make these small habit changes for one week:
- Have a positive outlook on things around you.
- Choose to be happy, because it is a choice.
- Say Please and Thank You, even if you don’t think you need to.
- Stop saying the word NO!
- Be Grateful for living the life you have lived and know it can always get better.
- Dream Big…. Huge… Enormously!!
- Smile!!!
Sometimes, things in life happen that will take you out of your rhythm,
but if you make the above habits a part of your sub-conscious routine you will see improvements in your mindset.
You will see how your thoughts change over time.
Making it a habit to be positive, ends up having an effect on everyone you come in contact within your universe.
That positivity, that humor, that kindness will inject itself into your decision processes.
It will make that process seem less stressful due to the fact that you know you are making the choice for the right reason.
This does not mean you need to be a pushover.
It does mean you should try not to say NO to everything.
Using the word, NO should be avoided at all costs.
Instead, reword it to a reason the answer is no.
For example, when someone asks you for a favor.
Instead of, “NO, I have to work tonight.”
You could just say, “I’m sorry, but I have to work tonight.”
The strength of the negativity on the word NO is very high.
You are still conveying the fact that you cannot help but are much less likely to leave a negative impression.
“I wish I had the ability or expertise to help, but alas, I do not.”
Others will walk away with a better view of their interaction with you.
Another angle is to find a compromise with the person.
“I’m not sure I can do that, but what I can do is…”
Both work equally well in different ways.
The word, NO, should be reserved for immediately dangerous situations.
“NOOOOO, don’t stick that fork in the outlet!”
Removing this word is not a small feat.
Just like most things in our lives, this is a habit we need to break.
You will find that if you focus on the other smaller habits mentioned above,
the word no will slowly fade from use naturally.
Be the sunshine you want to see in others, and they just might start showing it back to you.
As Always,
I Find You Kind